Irony at it's best
by nightmaresofyou
Summary: An overworked Loviana is trying to support her two siblings, Romeo and Feliciana, as well as trying to keep her sanity together. The last thing she needs is a nosey no good school teacher coming to mess things up even more. Follow her as she faces b ad luck, clumsiness,two left feet, broken grocery bags, a whole lot of big girls words, and much more! Fem!/Nyo!Romano x Spain


A/N: Hi! This is my very first published fanfiction EVER, so to say the least I'm intimidated lol. I've been in love with this ship for years now and I think there needs to be more fanfiction for these two cuties! So buckle in and take this long ass roller coaster ride with me, HERE WE GO!

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Irony At It's Best

chapter 1

Sometimes I really do think I work too hard, maybe I should start listening to Feli more often on how I should take time out for myself, stopping to smell some random ass flowers, and all the other shit that spews out of her mouth during dinner. Loviana thought as she taking out her keys, fumbling them around trying to find the right one.

"There you are you little bastard." She grumbled when she finally found it. The old worn scarlet door creaked as Loviana all, but slammed it shut. She trudged over to an old dingy recliner that sat in the corner of the room. The living room was a fairly decent size, it wasn't big, but then again it wasn't small either. An olive couch, which Loviana hated the color of, but it was free so she didn't complain too much about it, sat in center of the room. Two chairs sat on opposing corners. One was a deep violet velvet chair that Loviana "borrowed" from Francis and the other was the old baby blue, now more gray than blue, that Loviana was now sprawled across.

Her living room would remind someone of an old quilt with mismatched patches. There was almost no such thing as color coordination in the Vargas house hold.

Loviana let out a heavy sigh, Now I can finally take these two inches of hell of my feet. She moaned as she finished pulling her shoes off, tossing the little foot demons across the room. So Good.

The smell of pasta began making its way to Loviana's nostrils, making her stomach grumble like she hasn't ever eaten.

"Feli I'm Home!" She shouted from her chair, like hell she was getting up, she had spent over eight hours on those one horned demons.

"Sorella! I'm so happy your home! How was your day?" She bubbled as her came from the kitchen walking over to Loviana placing a custom kiss on each one of her cheeks.

Feliciana was only thirteen, but already the image of spitting beauty practically a housewife. Loviana, who was clearly opposed of that idea let alone the idea of her Feli getting married, always told her, "Now Feli you listen to me, when you get married you get a job understood? You can't depend on whoever your husband is for everything got it?"

Just a look at Feliciana you would understand what she meant, standing in front of Loviana, Feli had a light pink frilly apron which was dusted with flour and her cheeks speckled with tomato sauce. Her golden brown hair tied up in a neat bun, especially when compared to Loviana's bun which had wavy fly aways sprawled about.

"My day was just a today, just like any other day." Loviana said smoothing out Feliciana's hair. "Now how was your day, bambina?" She asked in a soft calming voice with a small smile that only a few people got to see monthly, let alone daily, but it was Feli and Feli saw everything, good or bad, about Loviana.

"My day was just great Sorella! Ms. Honda is getting married you know! She told me today when we were eating lunch together today. I guess I'll have to call her Mrs. Karpusi ."

"I guess you will now won't you."

Ms. Honda, or Sakura as Loviana knew her as, was Feli's art teacher. She was a quaint Japanese women with short black hair and straight across bangs, she never spoke much to anyone and if she did it was always short and profound, well most of the time. One day Feliciana was being pushed around and bullied by the bigger kids at school and Sakura stepped in and asked Feli if she would like to eat lunch with her in her classroom and ever since then Feli has eaten her lunch with her.

" Who is she getting married to again?" Loviana didn't remember her ever hanging out with males outside of her family, let alone having a boyfriend.

" Mr. Hercules, he's the one that lives in 22C you call him the tired lazy butt cat man." Feli said leaving out the curse word. "Speaking of which when are you going to get a boyfriend Lovi?" She said with a sly smirk.

" When tomatoes fall out of the sky and Francis has a bad hair and wardrobe day all in the same day." Loviana chuckled, boyfriends weren't exactly her forte. She had always come off as too strong on guys and if she made it that far they would just decide that she was too much of a handful to deal with.

"Don't be silly Lovi, someday a guy will come in and sweep you off your feet and it will be just like the princess stories that I was told when I was little." Feli said dreamily placing both of her hands on one cheek.

"Don't be ridiculous Feli, Princess wear beautiful gowns and are graceful as a ballerina, I hate even the thought of a dress and have just about as much grace as a fish out of water. Speaking of princesses where's our brother?" Loviana asked in a serious tone.

"Veeh~ Well umm... Romeo is uhhhhhh." Feliciana mumbled using her vocal tic that only came about when she was extremely nervous, scared, angry or extremely happy.

"Feliciana, I know you're lying. Where the hell is that overgrown toddler." Loviana grumbled.

" Ummmm... He's uhh trying to flirt with Gabby again. I told him you would be home soon and be angry if you found out that he left me home alone, but he promised that he would be home on time today." Feliciana said all in one breath.

" I told that little bastard to come home right after he got done at the auto shop. This is the last fucking straw." Loviana growled getting up and heading towards the door opening it.

"ROMEO ROMULUS FUCKING VARGAS YOU GET YOUR LITTLE PRETTY BOY ASS RIGHT HERE OR I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL RIP YOUR FU-" She yelled from behind the threshold of her door and was cut off short by the little fucker himself running inside and shutting the door quickly.

"I'm so sorry Sis, you see I was held up and couldn't get home on time and then you know Gabby wanted to talk to me because why wouldn't she and" lf. He was cut off short by the raging thundercloud of Loviana herself.

"Feli go set the table while me and your brother have a talk." She said arching a very pissed off eyebrow at Romeo.

"Yes ma'am." Feliciana said as she quickly sprinted out of the room and into the safety of the kitchen. Even she knew that some serious shit was about to go down in the Vargas household.

"Romeo what the hell did I tell you about coming home exactly after you get off of work! You wouldn't even have that job if you and Matthias didn't bother me for weeks about it and you know that even after all that begging I threatened to rip his ball sack off of him and shave all that spiky ass hair off his precious damn head and Lukas would help. Don't you know how lucky you are for even having your job, Feli has been fucking bugging me for months about getting a job and damn well deserves one more than you do because she would respect my fucking rules." Loviana yelled while grabbing his ear down to her level.

"Loviana I only wanted that job so you could take some time off and we'll be able to have some extra money." Romeo sighed helplessly knowing that his case wouldn't get him anywhere, but at least he managed to get her to let go of his ear.

"It's very nice of you to think about me. You and Feli both, but you have to realize Romeo. You're only sixteen, which is fine, but, Feli is thirteen so she needs someone at home with her when I work late. Plus its my job to take care of the family. We can't just live off of Nonno's bi monthly checks can we?" Loviana told him looking sincerely at him.

Romeo was really a handsome young man. His mischievous bright green eyes and bright auburn hair were always his two best features.

"And haven't I told you to leave Abigail alone? She's told you to fuck off herself multiple times and if she is anything like me, which she is, you better be happy she hasn't fucking castrate you by now." Loviana said pinching the bridge of her nose as she noticed the small red hand mark on his right cheek.

Abigail was Feli's age and Romeo was head over heels for her even though she didn't feel the same way. I guess those green ass eyes of his can't work on everyone even though he had almost a whole damn flock of hormone driven teenage girls swooning over him.

"Yes Lov, you've told me that many times before." He looked down at his feet and grumbled.

"Good now go help your sorella finish up with dinner." Loviana ruffled his hair as she ushered him away.

What am I going to do with these two? Loviana thought as she walked over to the old wooden cabinet, many pictures sat on top of it. Loviana picked up the most recent one one that was in a black frame. She smiled slightly fondly remembering when they had took that picture. It was Loviana's last day working at the photo shoot place and the only reason she was even working that day is so they could squeeze some free labor out of her, so Loviana sneaked them into take some pictures for free. Felicia and Romeo sat side by side as Loviana stood behind them. Felicia smiled brightly, her copper eyes were almost as bright as the sun itself. Her golden brown hair bounced about her in curly ringlets. Romeo was doing his classic side smile, it wasn't a smirk, but not a smile either. His bright auburn hair flew here and there in curly strands. Then there was Loviana, her dark auburn hair was down for once, joy shown vaguely in her eyes. Unfortunately, the joy didn't reach her lips, which a contempt curve was set on. Each one of them had their families trademark odd curl that sticks out and never goes down even if it's drenched, poking out of their hair.

"Sorella dinner is ready!" Felicia called from the dining room, which also was the kitchen, breaking Loviana away from her thoughts.

She sat the picture back on it's place and headed towards the kitchen. The small table was set with three heaping plates of Feliciana's homemade pasta. Romeo and Feliciana were already sat down ready, "Alright, What are we waiting for let's eat?!'' Loviana said excitedly clapping her hands together.

"Loviiaaannaa, We have to say the grace!" The ever so angelic Felicia said from her chair next to Loviana whom cursed under her breath. It wasn't like Loviana didn't believed in God, but she was pretty sure she was a lost cause in his eyes. Regardless, Loviana grabbed Romeo and Felicia's hands.

''Lord please bless this wonderful food we are about to eat and everyone at this table amen." Loviana said as quickly as she could, so she could scarf down the food as quickly as possible.

"Oh Sis, I.. uh..um got something important to tell ya." Romeo said scratching behind his neck avoiding eye contact with Loviana.

"Well what is it? You see I'm trying to eat here." She sighed as she inhaled another forkful of pasta.

"Well you see, one of the teachers at school wants to meet you Tuesday..."

"Oh yeah! Same here! They sent a letter home and everything, I left it on the table before you came home." Feliciana chimed in smiling.

Loviana looked down as she picked up her napkin only to realize that it wasn't a napkin. With smudged letters which were speckled with pasta sauce read: 'Parent and Teacher mandatory conference', the rest she couldn't really make out, but she could guess what it said for herself.

"Shit!" she yelled as she began to choke on her food, pounding her fist on the table. She hates school so fucking much.


End file.
